Do You Judge?

by - Wednesday, March 11, 2015

"The judge is supposed to conduct the trial impartially... hears all the witnesses and any other evidence presented... and then issues a ruling on the matter at hand..." - Souce: Wikepedia

But how often have we judged others based on only our point of view? How often have we judged others without first finding out the reasons behind? How often have we judged other unfairly

Many, many times. There are so many newsfeed on the news and social media of which many people are simply throwing their judgements heedlessly. 

When you see a child rolling on the floor screaming and crying, what is your first judgement? That the parents are doing a bad job? That the child is a spoil-brat? Why is the parent not doing anything to stop the child? Is there something wrong with the child?

In many cases, people starts to gossip among themselves and even with the strangers standing next to them. They start drawing their own imaginations and adding in many information which might not be true. They start finger pointing and shaking their heads. And not forgetting the 'tsk, tsk, tsk'. For some, they might not say anything or do anything, but you know they are secretly saying or thinking something to themselves.

I judged. Pre-children and post-children. Although I try hard not to judge, I sometimes still do the silent judge.

"Do not judge, or you too will be judged" - Matthew 7:1

That's what happened to me. I judged and now it's my turn to be judged.

Big J suddenly ran off from me, dangerously towards the road. 'Oh... that mom is so irresponsible. How could she just let her boy run off? It's so dangerous.'

Me giving 10 months old Small J fries and ice-cream. 'That's so unhealthy. Why is the mom so lazy to prepare proper food for the child?'

Big J taking over other children's toys, bike, scooter. 'Hey, you should control your child. He's so rude.'

Small J decided to lose himself and tried to roll on the floor of the bus, screaming and crying throughout the whole bus journey. During the struggle, he hit himself against the floor. '小姐, 不要这样. 小孩不可以丢的. (Miss, don't throw your child.)' 'Aiyo, why he keeps crying.' 'What's the mom doing?'

Judging is painful. It makes the person being judged feel bad and embarrassed. It makes her think that she is doing something wrong, that she is not a good parent. It will also makes the person throwing the judgement feel bad when he/she is in the same situation, someday.

So what do you do when a situation happens and it is so tempting to pass your judgement? DO NOTHING. THINK NOTHING. You can smile. Or you can ask the people around you to stop judging. If it is a dangerous situation, you can help but don't throw advice.

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